A Journey of Understanding the Reality of Religion

After moving to Utah, I attended church for the first time in years. I think the original motivation was purely for community. I wanted to find some friendly faces before I started feeling lonely - I hate feeling alone. Initially, I never thought it would be possible to convert me. I grew up with a heavy religious influence - my mother - and have always lead my life as I saw fit. It would be incredibly difficult to sway my belief system with conclusions I haven’t personally come to - and I still stand by this.

Interestingly, however, the 2nd week I attended church something very strange happened. I found myself wanting to believe in, not just God as I have been growing closer to God before I moved, but their religion.

This topic has interested me for a while now, and my recent proximity to it all has only poured gas on the fire. At times, I found myself obsessing over religious ideas - so I began to write. Not just for the sake of writing, but because I wanted to reconcile in my mind the many doubts I have and answer for myself this question: if we are wrong about religion, say none of it is real, is it worth living your life in a lie?

If this sounds interesting to you, I invite you to read my thoughts below. Though I warn you: if you are steadfast in your faith, it may make you doubt yourself. And if you are an atheist, as I was, it may make you more open to believing in one.